Tamaki's 5 steps
by LoneWolfLorelei
Summary: The Hitachin twins exlain the 5 steps Tamaki whent through to finding a cake at the last minute for the Host Club's Christmas party. based on a true event.


The following story is based off a true event which happened to my uncle last Christmas.

Do not try this yourself unless you really want to.

* * *

**Tamaki's 5 steps**

The host club sat around the large dining table. All dressed warmly and in winter sweaters...well accept Kyoya, there was no way in hell that he'd wear one of the hand knitted sweaters that the host club king had thrust uppon everyone this year.

A miniature Christmas tree sat in the corner of the room surrounded by fake snow.

Decorations where laced wall to wall and some hung from the chandelier above the table.

Used yet clean plates where removed from the table by the line of smiling servants.

"everyone ready for cake?" called Tamaki as he entered the room, a large chocolate cake balanced in his hands.

"wow" was all that Haruhi could say at the sight as Honey cheered in delight.

"funny story how he got that cake" Hikaru chuckled.

"5 steps to be exact" Kaoru added.

"Don't you dare tell my beloved daughter about daddy's mistake you devils!" whined Tamaki as he took his place at the table.

"Step 1: wait until the last minute to buy the cake" declared the Hitachin twins.

* * *

*flashback*

Tamaki pranced around the kitchen, looking through cupboards and flailing his arms around.

"no no no no no no noooooooooooooo!"

he cried after checking the fridge for the 5th time.

"HARUHI IS GOING TO BE HERE SOON AND THERE IS NO CAKE!!" he howled, falling to his knees.

* * *

"Step 2: go to a random store, freak out and say something random about chocolate"

* * *

*flashback*

The emotional blonde danced around the isles of a close by 24 hour convenience store, throwing things from the shelves in the process and causing random customers to fall over some of the items left lying around.

"CHOCOLATE! CHOCOLATY! CREAMY SMOOTH COCOA! CHOCO CHOCO SLAP SLAP!!"

* * *

"Step 3: get thrown out"

* * *

*flashback*

Two large guards carrying the blonde arm by arm, tossed him out from the automatic doors.

"and stay out you idiot!" they barked.

Tamaki looked up, a stream of tears flowing from his eyes.

"chocolate?"

* * *

"Step 4: repeat"

* * *

*flashback*

Tamaki ran around the other 24 hour store from angry employees and a heavily built security guard, dodging stacks of food and leaping over customers.

"chocolate! Haruhi! chocolate!!" he screamed, tripping over his own feet and skidding in to a stack of cereal boxes.

"The crazies do this every year" one of the employees muttered as the blonde teen was kicked out the automatic doors.

* * *

"step 5: go to another random store and hope someone takes pity on you"

* * *

*flashback*

Tamaki sat on a step outside another 24 hour convenience store after yet another defeat. Sulking and crying another stream of tears.

"I heard you where looking for one of these" said Kyoya, offering him a gourmet chocolate cake that was placed in a pink box for safe keeping.

"this is why you make sure you have everything ready before letting your chef go home for the day" he sighed.

"YAY THANKS SO MUCH KYOYA!" cheered Tamaki, slinging his arms around his best fiend, pulling him in to a tight hug.

"Tamaki...Haruhi is due to arrive at your house in 5...."

"KYA WE HAVE TO GET BACK NOW!!!"

* * *

"and that's how he got the cake" concluded the Hitachin twins.

"that's it!" Tamaki screamed, jumping from the table with a baseball bat.

"GET BACK HERE DEVILS!!" he yelled, chasing the twins around his mansion. Knocking many things over and making a trail of destruction in the process.

"Merry Christmas, Haru-chan!" cheered Honey before swallowing the whole cake in one bite.

"m-merry Christmas, Honey-semapi" Haruhi sweatdropped.

* * *

A/N: I hope you all like this random story and to clarify, my uncle seriously did this last Christmas although not quite the same way as Tamaki did.

Have a Merry Christmas and a Happy Hanukkah everyone

Please read and review.


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